How To Become A Sugar Daddy
If you're interested in sugar daddy relationships but know nothing about them, here's the first thing to know: it’s a satisfying and simple type of relationship, but that is something that works only for those who fully understand its rules. Here, you will find a full "How To Become A Sugar Daddy" guide — we will talk about:
- The websites to start with;
- The rules that have to be agreed on in order to avoid some common mistakes beginner sugar daddies make;
- How much a sugar relationship can cost on average, and so on.
If you want to know more about casual NSA relationships with sugar babies, continue reading.
Being a sugar daddy: How and where to start
The first step when you've decided to become a sugar daddy is finding a sugar baby. The easiest and most popular way to find an SB is niche dating websites. Yes, classic dating apps like Tinder/Match can perfectly work, too, but that’s not what they were initially created for, so the chance of getting a sugar baby is higher on specialized platforms.
Let's take a short look at some of the best websites for sugar daddies:
- one of the most popular sugar daddy sites for successful men and attractive girls. User-friendly interface, mobile application, and thousands of beautiful women who are searching for a sugar daddy—SecretBenefits has everything you may need.
— the sugar dating site that's rightly considered the flagship of the industry. It's the world’s most popular sugar daddy platform with a wide assortment of premium features, a tremendously good reputation, and 8 million members.
— after its launch in 2007, this dating service has quickly become one of the biggest sugar daddy sites for wealthy mature men and young, ambitious ladies. This website offers a lot of premium features, and there are more than 4,300,000 sugar babies on SugarDaddyMeet.com, according to the homepage of the site.
— it's not a specialized sugar dating service: it's rather a website for those who are searching for extramarital sugar relationships, but there are still thousands of sugar babies on AshleyMadison. This website has a mobile app, a lot of positive feedback, and it's a good choice for every sugar daddy (though, many women's profiles are not that detailed on AshleyMadison, which is understandable given its main concept and main dating type).
Sugar dating would have never gotten as popular as it is right now if it wasn’t for its many advantages compared to regular dating. If you are a successful man who knows exactly what he wants and isn’t considering long-term dating, being a sugar baby seems like a very attractive idea. But how exactly do you become a sugar daddy, and what do you need to know in order to start a sugar relationship? Here are 5 steps that will take you directly to your dream arrangement.
Here is a step-by-step guide on how to become a sugar daddy.
Before you start: Know what you want
Try to be honest with yourself, as a lot of things depend on how clear you are. What do you expect from your sugar baby? What do you want her to look like? What should she do for you? It is not about creating the image of a perfect woman and the attempts to find her, but about the clarity of your desires. You can start the search only once you’ve defined what you want to find—that's how most sugar relationships that are satisfying for both partners start.
Then, decide what you are ready to offer. How much should a sugar daddy pay to his sugar baby? What do you want to treat her to? This information will be necessary for the further steps.
Step 1. Start the search
There are some of the best sugar daddy sites listed above, but what if you aren't so good at online dating? Are there any other options? Basically, a sugar daddy can meet sugar babies online or offline, and both ways have both advantages and disadvantages.
- Looking for babies IRL. Of course, you can meet attractive women almost anywhere, especially if you attend fancy parties and events. The only problem with this option is that not every woman wants to be a sugar baby, and if she's a sugar baby, you never know if she is single. On top of that, it's not always easy to approach a woman when you know if she wants to talk to you or not. Nevertheless, though it’s not the most effective method, it still works.
- Joining a sugar daddy dating site. If you want to have access to the largest pool of sugar babies, sugar daddy dating sites will work the best for you. Of course, there's a chance to meet an attractive woman looking for sugar relationships on social media sites like Instagram, but again, it’s about trial and error. The thing is, on such platforms, everyone's looking for the same thing—a sugar arrangement, and also, an average sugar daddy website is likely to have around 70% sugar babies compared to 30% of sugar daddies. So, in this case, competition is on the men's side.
Though people seeking mutually beneficial relationships can meet each other in real life, most men still prefer to look for the best sugar dates online for the above-mentioned reasons. Moreover, a lot of sites offer you a matchmaking algorithm that finds women for you based on your expectations and desires. Sugar dating sites are also good because the whole procedure there is clear: you can see how much a woman wants, so you won’t be misled by the lady who asks for more than you want to give.
Our tip: Make some effort to create a great profile, it's worth it.
No matter how good sugar daddy site is, a lot still depends on what a user does to be popular on this platform. Some sugar daddies think that a young woman will be interested in a relationship in any case, regardless of how they look, talk, and represent themselves on an online dating site. It's not exactly true. Potential sugar babies know they can meet a weird man, a Splenda daddy, or a Salt daddy, too. The better your profile is, the less suspicious you seem, and the more attention you have. Here are some tips that can help you become a top member on any good sugar daddy website.
- Upload at least 5 photos. You can add fewer pictures, but the more photos you have, the better. It seems obvious, but most sugar daddies think that ladies will reach them anyway, despite having a low-effort account. The truth is the most attractive younger women are picky, too.
- Add a headline that expresses your desires/current thoughts/mood. Be creative, but don't mention anything dirty—most young women skip such profiles as they believe they are created by guys who are looking for sexual favors, not a mutually beneficial arrangement that involves not only intimacy but also companionship.
- Make some effort to write a really useful self-description. Yes, it must be useful for a sugar baby. Providing detailed information on your preferences, expectations from sugar arrangements, and things you are looking for in a woman will save your time in the future. That's how you let a sugar baby know if she can be a perfect partner for you or not.
It might sound easy, but thousands of wealthy men ignore these recommendations, so this can give you an advantage over others. Have a look at the following example of a good profile—it will help you develop your vision of your own personal page.
And now, let’s continue our instruction with the next step.
Step 2. Remember and avoid these sugar daddy mistakes
If sugar dating is completely uncharted territory for you, it’s nearly inevitable that you will make some mistakes along the way. These are the 6 most common sugar daddy mistakes for you to avoid.
- Talking about your former partners, especially in a negative light.
- Forbidding yourself from dating several women at once. You are free to date a few girls at once; luckily, becoming a sugar daddy doesn’t require you to guarantee loyalty to anyone. If it is your conscious choice—that’s adequate, but remember that sugar relationships aren’t regular relationships.
- Being afraid to show your emotions and appear sensitive even for one second.
- Thinking that the monthly allowance will get you anything you want. You will get only what you discuss with your sugar baby.
- Obsessing over your sugar baby and being unable to move on when things come to an end. What’s over is over.
- Becoming too attached to a sugar baby and demanding a regular relationship. Once you fall for a baby, your sugar relationships are over, and you start a new one that should be called another name.
First steps in sugar dating can be unusual, but, after all, you need some experience to get into this. So, the more you do, the more confident you feel. You even can find a book on Amazon about how to become a sugar daddy that can help you to start a bit easier, but being a daddy is still simpler than it may seem.
Step 3. Discuss your sugar relationships in detail
A sugar daddy should know what he has to do. How much he gives and how much he gets. Always talk to your sugar baby because it is vital for both of you. In fact, it all begins with talk, so remember to discuss all the issues that matter. You can make some extra notes or even write down your wishes and then discuss them with the SB online if you’ve met on a dating website. Remember to ask as well: two parties should sign a sugar contract, and both must be satisfied.
Step 4. Go on a date
Don't stay for too long on a sugar dating site, even if a lady notes she wants to get paid for the first date (it's an adequate thing, a sugar baby wants a guarantee, even if she's going to receive a monthly allowance in future). Many sugar daddies say only a real meeting can help you understand if you two really match each other, no matter how much time you spend chatting online.
Step 5. Remember to stay safe
The best sugar daddy sites care a lot about their customers’ safety, but it is always good to take care of yourself. Remember to keep your personal data protected, try to avoid public pictures, and think about getting a second phone number and an email address for the registration on the site. It isn’t the best idea to use your Facebook photos while signing in.
You should also protect yourself from blackmailing by the fraudsters who can find your profiles on social networks and tell bad things about you or extort money. Make a choice for some other pictures; it will be a wise step in your sugar daddy experience. Also, check our sugar daddy relationship rules guide.
Sugar daddy types: Different daddies need a different relationship
Not all the sugar daddies want equal things.
Surprisingly, it's not even about sex in the first place—according to surveys, 4 out of 10 sugar babies have never had sex with their SDs. There are lots of sugar daddies’ archetypes—a man can be a “mentor”, a “lover”, a “friend”, a “sponsor”, etc.—the main difference between these concepts is the goals a sugar daddy has.
- A person who is looking only (or mostly) for a sexual relationship with a young woman in exchange for money or other material benefits can be called "Lover".
- A man who wants not just to have sex with a beautiful woman but to help her achieve her personal goals and share his precious experience with a woman is closer to the "Mentor" archetype.
- Daddies who fall into the "Friend SD" category have, as the name implies, different goals—they are often focused on becoming a friend to a sugar baby, on learning more about her life, and on helping her make the right decisions in life. The relationship such sugar daddies usually want to have are platonic, and yet they can involve sex sometimes.
- "Sponsors" are something in between—they support younger girls with money in exchange for sex (like “Lovers”), they can give some wise advice (like “Mentors”), and they often want to know their SBs better, just like all the “Friend” sugar daddies.
It's very important to remember that few SDs can be classified as 100% "Friends", "Lovers", “Sponsors”, or "Mentors" — it’s very common to see sugar couples where the daddy is both mentor and friend, mentor and lover, or lover+sponsor, etc.
Main rules of how to be a sugar daddy
First of all: yes, there are many rules, and we’ve started to talk about them earlier. Following them is extremely important to have a successful sugar dating experience—if there are no rules or if one side doesn't follow them, sugar dating will most likely go wrong. You already know how to start successfully; now, let’s discuss how to continue and maintain a satisfying and mutually beneficial relationship:
- First, agree on the contract. When it comes to sugar dating, there is no clear agreement on whether the contract must be verbal or written, but there always should be a contract. Discuss everything possible — the number of times per a certain period of time you'll meet her, the amount of the allowance, the duration of the arrangement, the payment methods (cash works best, just a tip), etc. The more conditions you introduce into the arrangement, the higher are the chances that everything will go as you expect. Don't forget to create a schedule — sugar dating is not like regular dating when it comes to unexpected meetups.
- Keep flirting under control, and don't start texting sexual things right away (unless it's in your contract or she initiates it). According to some sugar babies, they don't like it when their potential sugar daddies are very sexually forward in texts at the early stages of their relationships. In this regard, it’s pretty much like regular dating with a shorter courting stage.
- Set the boundaries. For example, are you going to be exclusive with your sugar baby? In this case, you will need to discuss that and let her know that you are not happy to see her having a relationship with other sugar daddies. Conflicts can break even the best SB relationship, and that's surely not what you need.
- Be straight and honest about what you don’t like, and discuss the deal-breakers. No one likes their time being wasted, and you are surely not an exception — so how would you feel if your SB canceled the date at the last moment? And what if this problem occurs multiple times? Discuss this in advance to not be disappointed (and to not disappoint your sugar baby).
- Set the boundaries for sex, too. If you're going to have a sexual relationship with your SB, it's necessary to discuss this part of your sugar dating story. What does she like and what do you like? Are there any things you feel uncomfortable about? What taboos do you have? This is a very important topic to discuss because if you don't do it, conflicts and misunderstandings are almost inevitable.
- Never share your bank information. It's also not recommended to send money to the women you haven't met in person yet, but it's up to you — some sugar daddies prefer online-only dating, so if you're one of them, go for it. But, you should never share any financial or personal info, e.g., your credit card number, SSN, CVV number, etc.
The sugar dating sites have their rules, too. These rules are not about what should a sugar daddy do on the date or about how the sugar babies should act. These rules are typically focused on the usage of the website and on how not to get banned. For instance, such things as spam, solicitation, hate speech, gender bias, and harassment are forbidden on the absolute majority of sugar baby services, just like in any virtual or real place existing. Posting comments that reveal anyone's personal info is also forbidden, as well as sexually demeaning language.
How much does it cost to become a sugar daddy?
That’s what do sugar daddies do — they pay their SBs and exchange their financial gifts for emotional and physical companionship. But how much can you spend?
The allowance provided to the sugar baby can range between $1,000-$5,000. The numbers always depend on several factors, e.g., the popularity of the girl, her location, the number of meetups, etc. The popularity, attractiveness, and self-esteem of a sugar baby are among the most important factors—in general, the more men find a woman appealing, the more her potential daddy needs to pay for being with her.
The location is important, too—the monthly allowance might be as low as $1,000-$2,000 in small cities, but it can be as high as $5,000-$10,000 in San Francisco, NYC (Manhattan), LA, etc. The number of dates will influence the payment only in case a couple has a "pay-per-date" system—if the partners/lovers choose the monthly allowance, this factor is neglected.
We don’t want any misconceptions: sugar babies are perfect for any man. Again: sugar dating is a good choice only for successful, financially stable men who clearly understand the rules and who are ready to follow these rules properly. Rules and boundaries are the most important things for any man who wants to enjoy the sugar dating experience. If you are okay with that, it is quite easy to start by choosing one of the best sugar dating sites, for example, one of those we’ve provided earlier in this article.
With the right approach, getting a perfect sugar baby and then enjoying the benefits of the relationship becomes the easiest thing in the world. The good news is that there are lots of helpful guides for you to study. However, it’s impossible to get the necessary experience just from reading, so if you want to try your luck with sugar dating, muster the courage to begin your journey.